hello, old friend.

you guys. it's been almost four years. four. a lot has happened in that time, and our life looks completely different these days.

for starters, we have been incredibly, incredibly blessed with these two precious loves.

oh you guys. outside of jesus, that's my whole entire heart, all in one picture. i was crying before i started writing this post - just completely overwhelmed with these two, healthy, precious blessings whom travis and i love so much.

i needed an outlet so i pulled out my laptop and found myself navigating to this old, but familiar place. i've said for a while now that i wish i kept writing, documenting the experiences and adventures we've been on. maybe i will again. maybe tonight will just be a one-and-done-again for a while. i don't know. we'll see where my heart {and time} is led.

what i do know is that parenthood has wrecked me in the most incredible, beautiful way i could have never imagined. the bittersweetness of the experience is overwhelming sometimes. i could not be more grateful {and i mean that so sincerely} that i have two beautiful, growing babies. growing means they're healthy. learning means they're doing what they should. but it also means time is marching on. time. i've always been ever-aware of how quickly it passes. so i have to remind myself that i have to take time to celebrate the incredible love and joy i feel when seeing these babies because already my heart aches as i picture them walking out the door and spending the majority of their life outside of the walls of our home. and i don't want to spend the next sixteen and seventeen years sad. i want to relish this season of our adventure. before marriage and before babies, i never knew i could love people as fiercely as i love these three people. and if anything were to ever happen to me, i would want my babies to know i loved them fiercely, with an everlasting, inexplicable love.

God is so good, you guys. he is so, so good. and seeing how i love these three has given me just a tiny glimpse of His unchanging, unwavering, inexplicable love for us.

i'm in a hotel room in washington, dc. {unlike four years ago, i don't actually travel all that much} but i'm in dc and i've been able to facetime my favorite guy and those two babies i can't quit gushing about; travis and i have spent a good half hour texting about our days; he's reminded me multiple times to take care of myself and be safe while i'm here; and i've reminded him that it's time for us to talk about our hopes and dreams again. and that i love him always.

life looks so different than it did four years ago -- it looks so different than it did even a year ago. but i love it. and i'm grateful for it.

where will we go next? i don't know. but i'm glad we'll be together. and i'm grateful it includes cohen and norah and their journeys, too.